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Archive for May, 2015|Monthly archive page

What the L

In Comedy, Communication, Griot, Networking on May 29, 2015 at 1:31 am

talk-about-affairs

Good afternoon good people, take a hit and pass
I’m not on a mission about dissin’ – I’m all about the laugh.

Reality is running rampart, may comedy dispel,
and this little segment is something I like to call:

what-the-l

happy divider

LAWYER ON HIS DEATHBED

Steve lies dying, as Jack, his law partner of 40 years, sits at his bedside.

Jack, I’ve got to confess — I’ve been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I’m the father of your daughter, and I’ve been stealing from the firm for a decade.”

“Relax,” says Jack, “and don’t think another thing about it. I’m the one who put arsenic in your martini.”

CHRISTMAS BONUS

Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month’s Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?
Secretary: My lawyer.

DELIVERY COINCIDENCES

Four expectant fathers pace in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. The nurse enters and tells the first man, “Congratulations, you’re the father of twins.”
“What a coincidence,” the man says. “I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team.”
A little later, the nurse returns and tells the second man, “You are the father of triplets.”
“That’s really an incredible coincidence,” he answers. “I work for the 3M Corporation.”
An hour later, the nurse tells the third man that his wife has just given birth to quadruplets.
The man says, “I don’t believe it! I work for the Four Seasons. What a coincidence.”
After hearing this, everyone’s attention turns to the fourth guy who has just fainted. He slowly regains consciousness and whispers, “I should have never taken that job at Century 21.”

what-the-LYou know how I feel about a good mind and most engineers have them…

THE ENGINEER AND THE FROG

An engineer crosses a road when a frog calls out to him, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.”

He bends over, picks up the frog and puts it in his pocket. The frog speaks up again and says, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week.”

The engineer takes the frog out of his pocket, smiles at it and returns it to the pocket.

The frog then cries out, “If you kiss me and turn me back, I’ll do whatever you say!”

Again the engineer takes the frog out, smiles at it and puts it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asks, “What is the matter? I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, I’ll stay with you for a month and do whatever you say. What more do you want?”

The engineer says, “Look, I’m an engineer. I don’t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that’s cool!”

police-pointing-thumbailDISARMING THE GUARD

Lem: “I got fired from my job as a bank guard.”
Clem: “That’s awful. What happened?”
Lem: “Well, a thief came in, and I drew my gun. I told him that if he took one more step, I’d let him have it.”
Clem: “What did the thief do then?”
Lem: “He took one more step, so I let him have it. I didn’t want that stupid gun anyway.”

Smile broadly – like you’re slick and peak a little peer curiosity,
I’m Qui
Laughing with you via la comical veracity.

What the L?
Everybody needs to stop and laugh for a spell.

dog-funny-animated

[Jokes compliments of jokes.cc.com]

She’s walking – Time to Emotion check.

In Communication, Griot, Networking, Self Improvement on May 27, 2015 at 11:32 am

The Cupcake Chique & Qui16-years ago my hubby went to a little store called StrideRite and bought the cutest pair of white (hard top) walking shoes. They were the cutest thing. Our daughter was 13-months old and walking, but I didn’t ask for shoes. I asked for the crib be assembled, and for the Winnie The Pooh bedding be put into place, including and especially the rail bumpers. I asked that the Winnie The Pooh wall decals be put up. I even asked for that cute little Pooh lamp to be placed on her night stand – it comforted her through a few late night rain storms, when she couldn’t sleep – but I didn’t ask for walking shoes. Fashion baby shoes with soft soles were fine, I mean, I knew she couldn’t go out bare footed, but it’s something about the attached commitment to buying walking shoes that I didn’t want to sign off on. I knew that once she had walking shoes, she’d be walking out of here for higher learning, dates, and ultimately walking down the aisle and into her own household.
No! I didn’t ask for walking shoes.

I asked my husband to take them back, but he had already made peace with the situation that was LIFE UNFOLDING, he laughed at me and put them onto her feet. That was 16-years ago. It was a joke then. I joked that I didn’t ask for walking shoes, but somewhere deep on the inside — I think I meant it.

16-years have passed since she received her first pair of walking shoes, over the last 4-years she traded them in for running shoes and joined the cross country and track teams. This kid has walked, ran, and sprinted through the last 16-years. I’ve enjoyed every motion, every stride, still consider had she done it soft soled shoes — maybe she wouldn’t have done it so quickly, but then again, she may have orthopedic problems. lol! 🙂 16-years has only felt like a few. I still blame the shoes. However, judging by the way she’s walking into college, I’d have to say those shoes were actually pretty awesome! Look at her form.

decorative-line-divider1

I said, “Daddy, don’t do it!” but he bought those darn shoes anyway
and today is the day that she turns a new page and graces the commencement stage.

She and her friends think it’s ‘all the rage,’ but to me, it is a change in progress.
She’ll be in a dorm and fine and the domestic time will be mine, we’ll both survive at best.

Life goes on and we’ll all keep walking
but to her father, I won’t be talking. 🙂

No one asked him to buy those shoes at all.
Now a new life awaits the mini-me, still small.

Without stall she will receive her high school diploma – today,
I’m Qui
Fixing my face, my mind and my attire to see my daughter walk away…

It’s the life we prepped her for, the one she’s been yearning.
Today my high schooler graduates and walks into higher learning.

Sleep thief – after my teeth!

In Communication, Griot, Music, Networking, Self Improvement on May 25, 2015 at 8:28 am

the-teeth-grinderSound asleep, quiet, and way past the twilight
I’m awaken by the sound, “crash, boom, pound!” —
it duly disturbs the still of my night.

I see nothing at the opened slant of my heavy eye.
The noise wained quickly – was it a car passing by?

Drifting back off to sleep, I ride the dreams that carry
then I see flutters of yesterdays rutters — it’s ye old Tooth Fairy.

But she is a flickering and fleeting blur,
though as the night noises rile up, the tooth assaults occur.

At one point, I was in so much pain that I could not sleep,
I started to feel like George Washington and opt to lose my teeth.

Just take ’em Lord Jesus! 🙂

But I’m no adolescent, my gums aren’t reproducing but permanent and otherwise mellow.
The perpetrator, my late night invader is that rigid grinding fellow.

Do you know him? Go-getters peg him best
as that dude who loves to ride your enameled vibe during times of stress.

He doesn’t want your teeth, he just wants to make the sound
of your top and lower teeth, in a ridge-to-ridge beef
doing ‘the San Andreas ground.’

Not a Clipse brother but I’m grinding and I’m doing so at night.
I wear a guard brace, between the gapped space to lessen the damage of fight.

Most of the time I sleep soundly, but as late at once a month
I awake to noise from my face, the guard is caught up in the crunch.

It sounds like there’s a thief in the house though no one is disturbed but me.
In my deepest sleep, I’m trying to retreat to alert my he that there may be a thief.

I awake to find a deep slumbering he and a home that it quiet,
I also am aware that my guard is mangled but fair – having survived the bone riot.

My God the pain that follows and lingers for days
and interrupts my daily broadcast of encouraging sun rays.

This bloody grinding has become a monthly phase.
No fairy visit or financial raise,

there is no corrective measure for this cousin to TMJ.
So I try to sleep harder and forget not to put the guard in place.

Thief! Thief! I declare thief!
I’m grinding so loud that I’m loosing good sleep.

Thief! Thief! Of charges – I count two.
Lack of sleep and grinding is something I shouldn’t do.

The oral surgeon understands and he offers a suspension-like mouth guard,
looks like DuPont manufactures it, and it would absorb the grind – good Lord.

There is another option, but far from it whilst I roam,
Doc says they could break and reset the structure of my jaw bone.

You better get on from here. Ooo child,
Doc said, it may or may not ‘change my smile.’

Hm. That suspension guard is looking better, durable and strong,
Doc said it will yield me help and only costs 1149 bones.
Now I’m on a fundraising jones. lol! 🙂

Life is good. I laugh and live for the write,
I’m Qui
Happy Monday morning to thee – to grind less is my plight.

It get’s better and better with each ray of the suns light.
Let me get my homeopathic‘ness on. Knowledge for a pain-free life.
ISO the silver lining via binded herbal writes.

Call me: The Watcher

In News on May 21, 2015 at 10:07 am

Qui Entertainment Magazine

relaize VISIONDr. Dre and Eminem aren’t the only watchers around here, this weekend I watched 3 videos that demanded my short attention. One video laced me up with game/encouragement, one twirled me around and the other yielded me wisdom.

Wether you’re a dreamer in route to formulating your life, mid-stride in lifes dance, or just in it for the long haul – todays view is for you!

.

Steve Harvey’s Dream Advice:

Dancewith John Lindo and Stephanie Batista:


If you don’t watch this couple through to the very end, you’ll miss the real treats of Johns feet. 🙂

.

Last but least while you’re healthy and strong,
I wanted to share a word with you to help you live long.

I’d like to take the opportunity to introduce you to a very cool soul,
He’s wise, dark and handsome, a #Leo –  113 years old:

output_DFrRTDMeet Bernardo LaPallo, his birthday is just two days…

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Apples to Oranges and/or Androids

In Communication, Griot, Networking, News, Technology on May 19, 2015 at 8:34 am

apples-oranges-androidsIt’s exactly like comparing two fruits, they are both delicious and nutritional in value, but they are definitely not the same. My 17-year old daughter, Dakota is responsible for this topic write-up, so she’s getting co-producer credits today. During one of our “girl time” errand runs yesterday, she started on a rant about Apple users and Android users and group text messages. Her specific was regarding the small number of her friends that are constantly left out of the loop because they have android phones and no one wants to mess up the smooth delivery vibe by adding them.
Her experience (and mine too) is that by adding an android user in your iMessage group text it almost always hinders the text delivery system, causing at least one if not several persons to not receive the text thus rendering chaos in the group text and ultimately leaving many people “out of the social know,” of their ‘oh so necessary’ info drops. A teens nightmare!

Even though Apple Stores and the Genius Bar is so 2.5-years past cool and on a steep downward slope, the Apple iPhone seems to still be cool. I visited the Apple Store in Chandler Fashion Mall last month and the smell of Bengay and warm breath was overwhelming. The majority of the patrons were well over 65 (which isn’t bad, but not exactly the ‘hip crowd I was used to mingling with when I stop by), and the Apple store employees were plentiful in bodies, but very few were helpful. I spoke to two employees wearing (WalMart) blue t-shirts and they both pointed to one guy standing in the center of the store surrounded by people who needed help. It looked like he was holding an auction. Needless to say he was too busy to help me and my new (fickle) iPhone 6 is still not operating as smooth as a new phone purchase should. Irregardless, I’m not interested in going back to that store; it was horrible experience and the stores appearance looked so third world. However, upon exiting the Apple store, the sun started to shining again as the breezeways were filled with happy teens spending their hard earned money, (or their parents) on the trends of the day. No matter what shops they went in and out of, or how many avoided the Apple store like the plague, most of the teens were iPhone 5S and 6Plus carriers. How do I know? I literally sat in the breezeway and counted them as they passed by while I was attempting to wait-out the auction process going on inside of the Apple Store.

It’s kind of mind boggling. I mean, how is the iPhone still so popular but the support (device and customer service) system is failing?

Apple Store REVIEW - Qui

History. Apple is notorious today for encompassing a recognizable history. I have so many Apple products that have expired their shelf life, from phones to computers, to software – Apple seems to be quite okay with if not proud of moving on to new generations and leaving old ones to fend for themselves, in hopes that users will get tired of being outdated and will opt to buy a new Apple product. So far Apple has been correct and new/upgraded purchases are still happening daily. But Why? For this hard mind bender, I went to the teen social guru Dakota and she said,

“Apple is more trendy, it’s still the trusted name brand that celebs carry. Likely because it has a uniformed user menu that works across generations and it’s simple, sleek and clean in design. Apple iPhone is equivalent to windows – everyone knows how to use windows.”

Good analogy. I remember being a die hard windows user and then I moved to the MacBookPro and started doing heavy film editing. I had every intention on using my Dell for document purposes, as it utilizes windows, however, it wasn’t long before I was using my Mac for everything, (right after I downloaded Windows). lol! I never thought of my Apple products as being trendy or ever even considered that I was a part of the “in crowd.” I just purchased my new iPhone 6 in February. I researched the androids, Samsung’s in particular and well, it just didn’t happen. I felt defeated on “change.” I shared with Dakota just how interested I was in getting to know the android and had hoped to purchase one and she said,

“The Android? Who’s using that? Not Bey, not Jay, Kanye nor the Kardashians are with the android. They’re trendily sporting iPhones.”

Are Android carriers less savvy? They’re certainly likely to be left out of the loop and out of most group texts (especially if the text originator uses an Apple). There are so many different androids on the market that there’s no universal menu system across android generations. No one knows how to “generally work” most androids because there are so many different brands that use the android operating system. For me, it was so unfamiliar lost interest while perusing before purchasing. My guy has a Samsung S5, he purchased it around Christmas. He tried to encourage me and share his device with me and tell me about the pro’s of touch-device data sharing – a feature that we’d be able to use to share pics and videos. I love sharing data with him, but I wasn’t sold on that awesome feature, alone. He’s a savvy guy, but definitely a nerd and well, at present, he’s not very trendy among the teens who by far are becoming the largest group of consumer shoppers in the USA. But teens are not loyal. There’s definitely a pending pedastal for tomorrow’s pop culture phone piece, but it is not present today. Today Apple still looks like the leader in the fruit bowl, because of trendy reasons, but the truth of the matter is, Samsung has some pretty cool features that are to be admired. The internal components, alone, are remarkable and yield all kind of usage. The thing is, nobody really knows how to use it “in general.” As Dakota said before, uniformity seems to be the word of the day. Kudos Apple manufacturers. I see what you’ve done there and now our kids are doing your bidding, unconciously selling your product to friends who want to be in the group-texts of the socially trendy.

divider Abstract

I’m not into being clicky or trendy, but I do love some fruit.
A lot of phones are manufactured, still operating systems equals two.

The kids know what’s up, but I am more informed.
I wanted a new phone piece and Samsung didn’t charm.

iPhone won out the sale on familiarity.
Design and menu recognition worked for me.

My guy called iPhone users simple-minded in the dome
for not yielding change for lolling in a comfort zone.

Fine. I’ll be that. Dequota, myself, her friends and celebs
are simple minded in OS binding and have the best group texts.

So when it comes to comparing devices and drowning out the noise,
I kicked the topic to you of Apples to Oranges and/or Androids.

Which are using? Which do you prefer?
Are you aggravated in group texts when interruptions occur?

Do your “alternative OS friends” dissolve into a blur?
Do you pass down information by placing calls to him or her?

Communication is key and I am Qui by birthright.
I hang out with the youth – they live carefree and light.

I’m not in their group texts, because I’m pretty much for  ‘the lone.’
I pick and choose who to hit up with what – mono texting is my zone.

Apples to Oranges and/or Androids — what is up to your ear?
I’m Qui
and my iPhone 6 is suffering from audio that isn’t dependably clear.

Still, it’s not enough of a reason for me to turn it in.
To even pretend I like “talking on the phone” is for me Qui to commit a sin.

I’m a writer, a texter and though audio is garbled – I’m okay at the moment.
Apple, I love you, so fix my phone, before I go back to saying, “I don’t want it.”

Fruit is fruit, it’s all good and each has great benefits.
Dole, Del Monte, Samsung or Apple — what’s your spend?

Exciting writing is captivating and inviting…

In Communication, Griot, Networking, News, TV Shows on May 13, 2015 at 5:39 am

michael-narucci-julie-palecTo the Gods of literature, I pray you come to me
and do me real good like Michael Narducci.

Grant me a jewel piece like Julie Plec’s labyrinth mind.
The writ that they spit keeps The CW in line.

They’ve written so many shows that are favorites of mine
Like The 4400 — a dead mans time to re-shine.

And then there’s my all time favorite vampire-witch-dog sauce
that binds The Originals: Elijah, Rebekah and Klause.

Freya is now in the sibling mix and Aunt Dahlia is now in her personal heaven.
It took the Mikaelson 4 + 3 more to yield the will; the power of seven.

The season finale of The Originals was mystifying and has come and gone.
I happily await with breath at bait for the next season to come on.

The reel groove exciters are those darn creative writers. On them I do place my bet!
I’m Qui
and God bless the minds that are a treasure find like those of Narducci and Plec.

You’ve got my attentions,
my pen and my mentions.
We love your sci-fi renditions.

Keep-Them-Coming
#Julie Plec
#Michael Narducci

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES Pictured (L-R): Paul Wesley as Stefan, Nina Dobrev as Elena, and Ian Somerhalder as Damon. Image Number: VD4_3Shot_Garden_2386re.jpg. Photo Credit: Justin Stephens/The CW. © 2012 The CW Network, LLC. All rights reserved. The Originals The 4400 the medium

dot-dot-dot

Cool yellow wall

In Communication, Griot, Networking, Self Improvement on May 11, 2015 at 8:44 am

Tarisma: But I don’t see life like you do. I never have.
Qui:  And that’s okay. Your perspective is useful to me. It help’s me to shape the dimensions of my own situation. My view should help you likewise. Your journey is not mine, and mine is not yours, but if you share your view and I share mine, we may be able to calibrate our own situations into something more dimensionally desirable. What do you think?

I like yellow.  In particular this shade of yellow:
yellow-office
Life is huge. I think of it as a big body of water filled with action bouys, (i.e., opportunity). Pick and choose. Opportunities come with certain consequences. Choose wisely.

Stay Focused. I purposely painted my office wall yellow. A sunny yellow because it helps to me to connect with my default sunny disposition. I like to stay focused on ‘what I mean,’ what I’m trying to represent. I prefer to  focus on and linger in the good. Good comes in waves. I ride the waves. I enjoy riding your good waves with you – call me the cheerleader. Good energy is to be shared, therefore, if you’re having a high day please feel free to drop by and ‘show off’ for me. lol! #PutMeOnTheList I love living “the good feeling” with you. Also, I give the biggest high fives and the tightest hugs. “Go for it! Get it! You deserve it!”

You Get what You Give. — I live by it. I give a lot of good energy and I get a lot of good energy back. It goes both ways. #Karma If you want people to greet you with a smile, approach them smiling. 8 times out of 10 it works for me. 🙂

decorative-line-divider1

The world is colorful don’t be blinded by it’s beauty.
You like traditional, but she likes tooth fruity.

You don’t have to be bought, you are not for sale.
This body of water is yours, set up your boat and sail.

Build a life you want to live and be sure to take care
with the color of your walls and the memoirs you hang there.

You will see this every day, it will meet you at every point;
I painted my wall yellow because I like to feel sunny in my joint.

Life has many compartments, (i.e., many rooms),
Perhaps in another area, I’ll paint it a periwinkle hue.

This life (space) is yours, insist that it benefits you – without stall,
I’m Qui
Happy Monday morning to thee, focus on you and the hue of your wall.

Tarisma is currently working on her sunny disposition. She also confessed that her walls were factory gray and that she’s currently looking through swatches ISO a positive connection to change the color

Tarisma is the childhood friend that keeps me grounded. We’ve been friends since 7th grade English Honors class. I love her and need her.

Sprinkling a little FLOWER

In Communication, Griot, Networking, Self Improvement on May 10, 2015 at 8:43 am

happy-mothers-day

Happy Mothers Day Mom, sisters, cousins and that newly gifted lady.
Happy Mothers Day as well, to the lady who’s not YET birthed a baby:

divider blk_south

You are so very important, you have not only baby-sat many,
but when it comes to yielding encouragement and love, you give ’em plenty.
———————

To the miscarriage mom whose arms are empty, I’ve been there too.
With love in your heart YOU WILL LIVE the part, so Happy Mothers Day to you.

You will produce.
Stand fast like Sarah and your Isaac will come through.
I KNOW this to be TRUE.

Married or not, MOM you are still hot!
All that is GOOD, from you I got.

Dad played his part. Dad has his say;
I’ll highlight him in June — today is YOUR DAY.

Happy Mothers Day to you, you are indeed the best,
if it weren’t for your maternal wisdoms, we’d all be a mess!

Happy Mothers Day Oprah, Barbara Walters and all of the likes,
who forfeited laying on the table, but have birthed new & good life.

Life is to be had. Live BIG like there’s no other,
I’m Qui
Maternally loving all – I, too, am a HAPPY MOTHER!
XO!!

have_you_hugged_your_mom_today_bumper_sticker-r2c89829c3710488da9258c1a72fc3dc4_v9wht_8byvr_324

What the L

In Comedy, Communication, Networking, Politics, Self Improvement on May 7, 2015 at 1:05 pm

Great Dictator-cartoon
Good afternoon good people, take a hit and pass
I’m not on a mission about dissin’ – I’m all about the laugh.

Reality is running rampart, may comedy dispel,
and this little segment is something I like to call:

What The L!!

Don’t just be incredible, be a #Boss.

One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, ”How much is the yellow one?”

The assistant says, ”$2000.” The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it’s so expensive. The assistant explains, ”This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast.”

”What about the green one?” the man asks.

The assistant says, ”He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes.”

”What about the red one?” the man asks.

The assistant says, ”That one’s $10,000.”

The man says, ”What does HE do?”

The assistant says, ”I don’t know, but the other two call him boss.”

#Hillary ain’t no chicken but…

What do you get when you order a ‘Hillary Clinton’ at KFC?
Answer: Two breasts and a left wing.

Keep it #Professional.

Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month’s Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?
Secretary: My lawyer.

what-the-L

#QuickThinking is mandatory when a situation is sinking – especially when your odds are stinking…

To surprise her husband, an executive’s wife stopped by his office.
When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.
Without hesitating, he dictated, “And in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair.”

Thinking of getting a new #Car, keep in mind,
Children in the backseat can cause accidents.
Accidents in the backseat can cause children.

Resist the devil and he will flee, or just #Erase your first thought…
A gentleman sits next to a priest on an airplane. He sees the priest doing a crossword puzzle.
Time passes and the priest says, “Excuse me, sir, but do you know a four letter word that describes a woman and ends in ‘u-n-t’?”
The gentleman thinks about this and finally says, “I believe the word you’re looking for is ‘aunt.'”
The priest replies, “Oh, you’re right. That fits, too. Would you happen to have an eraser?”
Ooops! I saw you smirking. Go on and laugh a little bit.
Don’t let the mundane win or amount to about nit!

Smile broadly – like you’re slick and peak a little peer curiosity,
I’m Qui
Laughing with you via la comical veracity.

What the L?
Everybody needs to stop and laugh for a spell.
mickey_laughing-j95

[Jokes compliments of jokes.cc.com]

The Hook’s Definitive Rules of Travel.

In News on May 5, 2015 at 6:53 am
And... I'm always on-the-go

And… I’m always on-the-go

You know I have a constant thing for travel – I follow The Hook so that my efficiency doesn’t unravel.

You've Been Hooked!

I’m going to keep this brief, because let’s face facts, our society has become conditioned to switch our focus every ten seconds…

I’ve already lost you, haven’t I?

Oh well, for those of you who are still here, we’ll jump right in and see what happens. Worked on my honeymoon…

10)  Leave your baggage at home!  To be clear, I’m not referring to your luggage (more on that in a moment). No, I’m referring to your mental clutter; all of those little details that are so powerful they not only nag at you late at night, they haunt your time in the waking world.

  • That weaselly idiot Johnson at work. (Everyone has one; you would have ended him years ago but you’re too pretty to go to prison.)
  • The price of gas.
  • Your ever-growing metaphorical mountain of bills – which is about to grow even larger after your latest trip.

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